15 Megs of Fame




Diaryland is da bomb I just *have* to tell you how much this all sucks. Who're these other people he's writing about? Who's the freak writing this, anyway? What's gone before. What's going on right now? Where do *you* visit on the web? What're you building right now?


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Another smart-assed remark from Mike
Busted
15:20:00 on 2000-02-09

Celexa ® Day 6 (on Celexa), 34 (on antidepressants) Celexa ®

Feeling:

Okay, even though I forgot to take my Celexa last night. Oops.

At least they're built to snap in two easily; I'll take 30 mg the next two nights instead of 20 mg, since I'm just dosing up right now, anyway. I can't take it right now because it'll make me drowsy, although as slow as it was last night, that's probably no big deal.

Tried to access any of the audio from my journal lately? It's not there, is it?

I store it at Xoom; Xoom seems to not like me anymore, because they zapped my account there. Sigh.

Sure, technically what I was doing was "wrong," putting whole songs up in RealMedia format. However, if you ever listened to them, the sound quality was for streaming over 28.8-56K modems, so of course it didn't sound "quite right." Thus, I saw no harm in it.

I guess Xoom sees things differently; I'm trying to get in touch with them to see what the deal is (I had a few... uh... files there for temporary storage the other night, so maybe that's what they had their beef about, I don't know).

So, no more music. What's worse, I have to fix all these links. Bastards!


As I mentioned in the sidebar, things at work are way slow. Hideously so, in fact. They've started to trim staff. There's writing on the wall, it seems, hmm? Thus, my last day could be any time, apparently, unless I get integrated into customer support, which I'd just as soon not happen. (Nobody told me that when this was a temp job, it was this temp...)

Fortunately, yesterday I fixed the snafu in my paperwork with the staffing service here locally yesterday, signing my I-9. Now I just have to hope they find me something while I send around r�sum�s again. I should call the agency that placed me here (I've never actually been there, I just answered an ad in the paper, they did all my paperwork there) and see if they can place me somewhere else, too, since I'm in the system.

I think I'm just realizing that I'm going to have to go back to school. I keep trying to think where I'm at, and sure, I can probably break into web design, but the awful truth is that the tools get better all the time, lowering the bar for decent sites, and raising the bar for cutting-edge sites. I don't think I want to get into that pit, where you start out making a good deal of money and then as you expand you find your income limited and it's hard to break out of what you were doing into something else. Thus, if I shoot for web design, it's still a stopgap. (Stopgap measures are the story of my life.)

I keep giving lip service to nanotechnology; it's an exciting field, it's small, and holds a lot of promise, but I have to wonder if it's another of those sinks like machine intelligence. AI was hyped for almost thirty years, and while it produced a lot of great ancillary technologies it never built a mind. Maybe nanotechnology will be the same thing, a footnote in the annals of the history of technology.

Thus, sometimes I think I should just bite the bullet and go back into coding. After all, it's a natural geek thing to build software, right? The trick is this - I feel too old to do it now. When you get to my age you're not a "coder," you're supposed to be a "software engineer." That summons up visions of suits and mortgages and responsibility. Is that me? I hope not. After all, I keep wondering where my twenties went.

I just feel past it. It's not good to feel like a has-been (or more like it, a never-ran) when you're twenty-nine.


Enough existential angst. I'm making myself sick. Anyway, I'm running late for work. Sigh.

restlessmind


Ancient history:
2013-03-01"You'll be stone dead in a moment!"
2007-08-07I covet fuck you money
2007-07-16My own long, dark tea-time of the soul
2007-07-11My internet experience is lacking
2007-07-10Coincidence



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